Overall, this class went well. The students were engaged, all the students participated, and we completed the entire lesson plan on time. However, after the lesson finished, I felt overwhelmingly frustrated. I feel as though I am in a tug-a-war between creating a student-centered class and providing enough feedback and direction. This tug-a-war is further exasperated by the online environment that I am currently teaching in. I find that I have difficulty providing correction and feedback in the online learning environment because I am limited in the methods, I can use to provide feedback. It seems that even a small correction completely disrupts any discussion that is occurring in the class. In short, when I succeed in creating a student-centered class I feel as though I do not provide adequate structure and correction and when I succeed in providing correction and structure it is too teacher focused. I am also struggling to create student centered lessons that are suitable for all the students in my mixed level class. Inherently, my lower level students need more structure than the upper level.
I recognize that the frustration I am feeling is part of the tension of being both a student and a teacher. I think on a grander scale I am trying to adapt to a teaching style I am not entirely comfortable with yet, especially in an online environment. Furthermore, I think I am having a hard time finding a balance between the conflicting expectations of the different stake holders. Moving forward I would like to find a way to have parts of my classes be more structured and others be more open and unstructured. I also would like to experiment with different teaching styles to see what I feel comfortable with and what works for my students.
Although, I am feeling frustrated this week I am seeing a lot of growth and improvement in my teaching and know that feeling uncomfortable is part of moving from being a student to a teacher.